Here's the answer to a question I was recently asked via email. I pondered it for a while and this is the main thing...so I thought I'd make a late night video and share it.
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Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Thursday, March 19, 2009
The Heart of the Matter
Why can't the body you have be right? Why isn't your body right?
You might say:
Because it's too fat.
OR
Because it's too ugly.
You might say:
Because it's too short.
OR
Because it's too disproportionate.
You might say:
Because it's too flabby.
OR
Because it's too scrawny.
But what you really mean is:
Because it's mine.
I mean, think about that for a solid minute. It's true, isn't it? The reason you really hate your body isn't because it's too this or too that or not enough this or not enough that. Because, let's face it, you're a lot more forgiving of all those things when you see them somewhere else besides on YOU.
You hate your body because it's yours. Get to the heart of the matter. You have to go within to channel your hate into something positive. Changing what you dislike about your body isn't really the way to stop hating it.
Ask. Answer.
Why can't the body you have be right?
Why isn't your body right?
Because it's mine.
So, what are you going to do about it?
You might say:
Because it's too fat.
OR
Because it's too ugly.
You might say:
Because it's too short.
OR
Because it's too disproportionate.
You might say:
Because it's too flabby.
OR
Because it's too scrawny.
But what you really mean is:
Because it's mine.
I mean, think about that for a solid minute. It's true, isn't it? The reason you really hate your body isn't because it's too this or too that or not enough this or not enough that. Because, let's face it, you're a lot more forgiving of all those things when you see them somewhere else besides on YOU.
You hate your body because it's yours. Get to the heart of the matter. You have to go within to channel your hate into something positive. Changing what you dislike about your body isn't really the way to stop hating it.
Ask. Answer.
Why can't the body you have be right?
Why isn't your body right?
Because it's mine.
So, what are you going to do about it?
Sunday, March 8, 2009
Surrounding Yourself with Good
Okay, so I still can't figure out why my videos make me sound like I have a lisp in certain parts, and my hair looks like Kramer's from Seinfeld (lots o' curls and some of 'em pulled back in a clip makes for interesting-ness), I have no makeup on, and I'm wearing my glasses instead of my contacts---but that's how comfortable I am with myself and with all of you dear people. ;) Ignore the crazy hair, listen to the words, and have a happy, healthy week!
Thursday, March 5, 2009
Strengths & Weaknesses
Share your strengths, not your weaknesses. Really ponder that statement for a moment. Honestly, it's a pretty difficult statement to put into practice. We all inevitably show our weaknesses on a daily basis. We are not always giving the best of ourselves. We are raw and we are flawed.
But--if your strengths outshine and outweigh your weaknesses...well, that's something. Quality, my friends, not quantity.
And so...are your strengths outshining and outweighing your weaknesses? Are you actively trying to achieve that?
Then well done!
But--if your strengths outshine and outweigh your weaknesses...well, that's something. Quality, my friends, not quantity.
And so...are your strengths outshining and outweighing your weaknesses? Are you actively trying to achieve that?
Then well done!
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
The Everlasting Plateau
Usually, recovery is a rollercoaster--full of ups and downs, curves and upside down spirals. We hear this. We know this. We understand this. It makes sense. There is, however, a lesser known part of recovery I call the plateau.
The plateau is what really tests your patience. It's a time during recovery when everything is moving along in the same way--not getting worse but not getting better--for a very long time. It makes recovery almost feel...stale.
It gets that impatience raging.
It makes you wonder if there is a better place in sight or if you've reached your peak.
Well, let me tell you right now--you haven't. The plateau is good in a lot of ways, because you're not constantly worried about setbacks. You're not preoccupied with slipping up. You're not solely focused on keeping your life on track day by day by day. You've made it somewhere. You've made definite progress. You're doing okay.
Yet...
Each day now seems the same. You're okay, but you're not great. You don't feel free. And the worst part of it is nothing's changing. No matter how much you push and try, you feel the same day after day. And you wonder, what gives? Is THIS what I've been working for?
NO.
It'll come. It's coming. You're getting there. You just can't see it with the naked eye. But if you compare day 55 to day 88 you'll see a definite difference. Know what I mean? It's imperceptible on a daily basis, but it's happening.
The plateau is not fun. But it's stable. And that's a blessing. Trust me. It's anything amazing, but let me tell you, it's a far cry from being immersed in an eating disorder every moment of every day. And at the end of that long stretch of plateau...when you get there...is a slide. And all you're gonna have to do is get on and zoom right into freedom. No more mountains to climb. No more holes to jump over. Just a slide. And sure, some hills may spring up here and there after you've slid into freedom... but when you're living sweet freeeeedom a little hill here and there is totally do-able. ;)
Wait it out. The plateau gives way. You're not done yet! There's more to come!
The plateau is what really tests your patience. It's a time during recovery when everything is moving along in the same way--not getting worse but not getting better--for a very long time. It makes recovery almost feel...stale.
It gets that impatience raging.
It makes you wonder if there is a better place in sight or if you've reached your peak.
Well, let me tell you right now--you haven't. The plateau is good in a lot of ways, because you're not constantly worried about setbacks. You're not preoccupied with slipping up. You're not solely focused on keeping your life on track day by day by day. You've made it somewhere. You've made definite progress. You're doing okay.
Yet...
Each day now seems the same. You're okay, but you're not great. You don't feel free. And the worst part of it is nothing's changing. No matter how much you push and try, you feel the same day after day. And you wonder, what gives? Is THIS what I've been working for?
NO.
It'll come. It's coming. You're getting there. You just can't see it with the naked eye. But if you compare day 55 to day 88 you'll see a definite difference. Know what I mean? It's imperceptible on a daily basis, but it's happening.
The plateau is not fun. But it's stable. And that's a blessing. Trust me. It's anything amazing, but let me tell you, it's a far cry from being immersed in an eating disorder every moment of every day. And at the end of that long stretch of plateau...when you get there...is a slide. And all you're gonna have to do is get on and zoom right into freedom. No more mountains to climb. No more holes to jump over. Just a slide. And sure, some hills may spring up here and there after you've slid into freedom... but when you're living sweet freeeeedom a little hill here and there is totally do-able. ;)
Wait it out. The plateau gives way. You're not done yet! There's more to come!
Sunday, March 1, 2009
A Message to Start the Month of March
Well, I guess I'll start of the week (and simultaneously the month of March, I suppose) with another video. This is another one of my "slam poetry" pieces. I call it Free From the Fight and it's something I posted here back in June of 2008. It's a damn good piece to start off a month with though, and though the video quality isn't all that it could be, it'll do for now.
Spring is almost here, my friends. Be patient.
Spring is almost here, my friends. Be patient.