Arielle's Word of the Day #30: COMMUNITY

I hope you have all enjoyed this blogger challenge. I can't tell you how delighted I have been to receive the daily emails telling me how fun/thought-provoking/healing this has been for people. I may have created the framework, but YOU did the work.

You did it.

We are a community. I love to build on community. I love to see our strengths in all their glory. I love to boost people up, help them share, cheer with them as they rise above what holds them down. I have very much enjoyed reading all the posts of those who have participated in this month's Word of the Day challenge. It's been rewarding to see  how different we all are. I love that. I love that a single word can bring out such a rainbow of experiences, emotions, stories, art, self-discovery.

This blogger challenge has been a rich one. I feel rich to have witnessed the insight you have all shown and encountered. It's BEAUTIFUL.

Thank you for meeting the challenge. You exceed all expectations. Don't forget that you are amazing.

I want to give a HUGE thank you to my dear friend Tracey who helped facilitate this fantastic little blogger challenge. She propelled Hungry for Change and Actively Arielle into a work of art.

The Words of the Day may have ended, but your encouragement of each other doesn't have to end...nor does your self-reflection. Choose your own words of the day... choose your own paths... and look to your community for strength, renewal, and positive emotion. You are appreciated.

Love,
Arielle

PS. There may be future blogger challenges. :-) We'll give you some breathing time. The lovely Tracey and I have more in store for you.

Arielle's Word of the Day #29: MYSTERY

Life is a mystery. That's what makes it scary. That's what makes it wonderful. The beauty of it all is that we get to live the mystery one day at a time, together. We can do anything. Life is ours for the making. Mysteries abound.

We are all a mystery. To each other and to ourselves. That's what makes us scary. That's what makes us wonderful. The beauty of it all is that we get to live the mystery one day at a time, with ourselves, with each other. We can do anything. You can do anything. Life is ours for the making. Life is yours for the making.

GO!


Living the Mystery: Everyone is Looking

I am sharp, a polished statue

With eyeliner that speaks volumes

And hair that shines and falls

With perfect poise

Against the lapels of my suit jacket.

My smirk is confident,

My nods are important.

My nails are sleek,

My eyes are quick to discern.

I walk in brisk steps, heels click-clacking

On the hard floor.

Everyone is looking.

I am free, a hippie chick

With long, messed hair

That travels with me

And a singular smile

That proves I’m dancing

To the music in my head.

My swishing skirts

Follow my moves

As I walk in circles,

A book of poetry clutched in my hand,

Oblivious to the world around me.

Everyone is looking.

I am buzzed, a dance floor queen

With drink in hand

And hips that sway

To the beat of excitement and

The hum of the rhythm.

The darkness is loud

And the bright lights are

Calling to me

As I move each part of my body

With a passion.

My eyes are closed as I feel the song.

Everyone is looking.

I am rosy, a child in a meadow,

The green grass around me

And the blue sky above me.

My sunburned cheeks can

Feel my smile

As I twirl with abandon

And skip with delight.

My hair is wild,

My heart is light.

I wear a wreath of flowers

And my bare feet are brown.

Everyone is looking.

I am mystery, a mermaid in the water,

Sleek and supple,

Carefree and mischievous.

My eyes are wide with want,

My hair is like a garment.

The water moves with me

Like a friend I’ve known since birth.

If I splash, I laugh.

If I laugh, I’m beautiful.

I live for nothing

But the simplest joys.

Everyone is looking.

And I am looking back.

I am innocence, a dreamer on a porch swing

With lowered lashes and a book in hand.

Feet curled under, I breathe the summer

And smell my skin

While my eyes rove the pages

That hold stories of lovers

And sweep me up like a girl on a cloud.

I am everywhere at once,

With no experience

But a heart full of hopes.

When I sigh my softness shows.

Everyone is looking.

I am adventure, a spunky explorer

With crazy ideas

And confident independence,

The world at my fingertips

And my fingertips reaching.

The sun is my guide

And the wind is my song.

I am ready to go.

With knees rough from climbing,

I reach the top of a mountain

With respect and admiration.

Everyone is looking.

I am me.

I am looking

At everyone.

And everyone

Is looking

At me.

© ALB 2008

Arielle's Word of the Day #28: TRAVEL

I totally didn't plan this - but I just traveled. I'm actually in a different state right now, halfway across the country. I drove close to 14 hours to be in a dear friend's wedding. Traveling anywhere always has a sense of excitement associated with it, but this time, I'm really excited! There is nothing better than spending days with the best kind of friend, someone who warms the heart and fuels the soul. I'm so honored to be part of her wedding.

Travel has so many forms. I have been on many trips like this one - to see people who I consider to be of my sisterhood...people have become part of my foundation.

I have made many journeys. The journey into marriage with my husband. The journey into the life of a social worker and therapist. The journeys of various writing projects. But before all those life journeys, I made the journey into recovery.

I traveled to dark places and back out of them into the light.

And because of that tumultuous journey, I began yet another journey: I travel every day - figuratively, emotionally, and through words - to bring that hope to all of you. I take this role as seriously as any job, and in many ways it is one. It is rewarding in ways I cannot describe...because in doing so, I get to watch all of you travel too. I get to witness your recovery journeys and it is absolutely beautiful watching you run into the light.

Arielle's Word of the Day #27: BLISS

A life without an eating disorder is bliss.

At Last

I position myself in the billowing breeze,

Just to see if I’ll waver,

And I say what I please.

The triumph I feel when I stand on my own

Lifts me up to the sky

Unlike all else I’ve known.

© 2007 Arielle Lee Bair

Arielle's Word of the Day #26: PURPOSE

Almost 5 years ago, this was the first post on Actively Arielle:

I have started this blog to support eating disorder recovery and to help others along their way. I'm dedicated to contributing something, however small, to those who are in a position I know too well. It's really a blog for others.

I have a lot of writings from over the years--writings from when I was dealing with anorexia--that I'd like to display because they are a voice that can speak to others. I have poetry, dialogues, rants, entries, etc. These will be slowly posted here. I think sharing is important and extremely beneficial. I know that when I was struggling I would have loved to read writings about eating disorders (and all the respective emotions) on someone's blog--someone who I knew recovered. It's about hope. It's about strength. It's about turning tears to words so we all have something to work with, something to go to, and something to feel besides the pain and confusion.

Writing and sharing is a way to showcase the struggles, the battles, and the pain so that we end up coming out on top. I've learned to be actively ME--a me with whom I am happy. I've learned to live a life with which I am content. But to make a new beginning, one must first realize many things about the self, about the goal, and about the tendency to relapse, revisit, and revert to old habits.

Basically, what I'm saying is: I'd like to help.

So, read, comment, and feel free to email. We can help each other.

The blog took off and became an activist and motivational speaker and support group leader and a professional. But before all that, it started just as simply as stated above. That has always been my purpose, here and in life - to turn tears to words, to give hope, to help. I don't plan on stopping any time soon. Actually, ever.

Arielle's Word of the Day #25: FORGIVENESS

Forgiveness is so important in recovery from anything. Often, we have to forgive people who have had a negative impact on our lives. Most of the time, we have to learn to forgive ourselves.

Learning to forgive things from our past happens in time, as we come to terms with ourselves and heal our skewed perceptions. Our sense of self improves, we feel love for the person inside. But the MAIN thing I see people with eating disorders struggle to forgive is RELAPSE. Individuals get down on themselves and they get down on themselves HARD when it comes to their own relapse.

"I'm so stupid."
"I screwed up AGAIN."
"I can't do anything right."
"I'm not worth it."
"I can't believe I can't stick with this."

These are just some of things I have heard people say when they slip up and relapse while in recovery.

STOP. Just stop right now. And FORGIVE. Forgive yourself. Without forgiveness, you can't move forward.
Watch this. It's old, but it may just help you to let go and forgive that person inside of you who is still trying.

Arielle's Word of the Day #24: FACE

Today, I'm not going to talk about my face or your face. I'm not going to discuss physicality or beauty.

I'm going to talk about the face of eating disorders.

Eating disorders do not discriminate. They affect the young, the old, the in-between. They affect women and men. They affect individuals of all different sexual orientations. They affect people who have been abused, people who have addictions, people who are disabled.

Eating disorders affect people with children and people without children. Eating disorders affect those who have been bullied and those who have bullied others. They affect people of different heights, weights, and sizes. They affect people who are social and people who isolate.

Eating disorders affect models, world travelers, computer programers, dancers, nurses, lawyers, mothers, fathers, teachers, writers, etc.

The face of eating disorders is the face of the world. By stereotyping or pigeonholing we succeed only in separating people. An eating disorder can affect anyone. ANYONE. And the less narrow-minded we can all be about what that really means, the better we can help all the people who are behind the face of eating disorders.

Arielle's Word of the Day #23: SOUL

I've liked this quote ever since I read it several years ago. I'll leave you to ponder it today.


“You don't have a soul. You are a soul. You have a body.”
― C.S. Lewis

Arielle's Word of the Day #22: HOME

Home can be many things. The feeling of "home" is unparalleled. Beautiful. Strong. Remember that no matter where you go, you can always take a little piece of home with you. The following poem is several years old and short. It's a sonnet (I call it "Sonnet for the Self"), for those of you who are into poetry. I've done a Shakespearean sonnet, which means it is written in iambic pentameter abab rhyme scheme...until the last 2 lines, which is an iambic pentameter couplet. That's a lot of English talk for those of you who could care less, but regardless, the poem has an important message.

Sonnet for the Self

Inside the mind, there is a little room.

It has a tiny lock and just one key.

Around it, doubt and shadows tend to loom,

But when the door is opened, truth goes free.

This little room—it houses all self-love.

Tear down the curtains; let the sunlight in.

No need to worry what you’re worthy of—

To love yourself can never be a sin.

Just bask beneath the rays of love and pride,

And never keep this bright room locked away.

Do not be meek or feel you have to hide—

Without self-love, true joy will never stay.

So give this room all that you have to give,

And you will always have a place to live.

© Arielle Lee Becker 2006

Arielle's Word of the Day #21: FIGHT

Another short piece of poetry from me, for today's word. It's meant to be slam poetry - spoken word - but just imagine I'm performing it for you. :-)

My heart leaps, and reaps…it gently seeps the lessons I’ve been taught. No longer caught, I live my life without the strife of pain, strain, or fear of gain—I’m free. The world has opened up to me. I see.Struggles past have hurt their last and I have cast a new light—and in my sight is everything. I sing. I bring with me the story. There is no glory—only fact. Exact truth. No age or youth. Just life and understanding, the helping-handing, the demanding…of solution. Revolution. Retribution. I’m here, I’m here—for restitution! I’ve found at length I have the strength to now survive…really thrive…to jump and laugh and come alive. I’ve stood my ground, I’ve looked and found, I’ve died and tried to live again. I can. I can! There is no wall, no battle call, no way to know when you might fall. You must stand tall. You must recall the way you do not want to live—then give, and give and give some more, ‘til you are spent and on the floor. And then, yes then, and only then—it’s time for your ascent. You’ll start out bent…but slowly you’ll stand tall again. You can.

(c) Arielle Lee Becker 2008

Self-Nurturing and Self-Empowerment

Two important things in today's Wednesday Warrior video. Just as a supplement to the Word of the Day posts this week. :-)

Arielle's Word of the Day #20: COMPLIMENT

I have a compliment for you. A few, actually. You're beautiful. You're real. You're YOU. And you can DO THIS. (Because the most important compliment I have for you is: You're capable.)

Here it is. One big compliment. You maybe have seen this short, little video from me before. If you haven't give it a listen. If you have, maybe it's time to watch it again.