Sunday, August 30, 2009

Q & A

So, I realize I've been bombarding you with video after video lately. My blog used to be primarily words, words, words, with a link or two thrown in... and then, since March of '09, I've begun pushing my YouTube videos into the posts... as they say what I want to say... audibly.

Much of the time I figure, why type out what I've already said (hopefully) so well?

I do a weekly video for a popular recovery collaboration on YouTube, but I do think there is much value in the written word. Sometimes it speaks to us on a deeper level. Sometimes we like to print out certain things as a reminder. Sometimes we need to see the words on a page to really get them.

I get a ton of questions on my YouTube videos, but I get my best thoughts out on paper (or let's face it, by tapping the keyboard and watching my words appear on a computer screen). So... I'm inviting you to ask me...whatever you'd like.

I get emails on a regular basis, but what I'm proposing is that you drop me a line here, in my comments section (of this post)... and I'll answer every single one, going down the line.

You can post the comment under anonymous or you can use your username or real name. It doesn't matter to me... I just want to give you what you are really looking for when you hop on this site, hoping for some advice, understanding, and inspiration.

You can ask me general questions, specific questions, even personal questions. They can be directly related to eating disorders or they can not be. I'll answer each one to the best of my ability.

Hope you're all doing well... ask away!

16 comments:

Muthering Heights said...

This is my first visit to your site...you are a brave gal! I wish you the best in your recovery!

Arielle Bair (Becker) said...

Thank you for visiting. :) I'm actually "recovered." I lead a support group and have been healthy and well for over 3 years.

I spread the word and help others with their recovery.

Miss Keira said...

Hey miss Arielle,

1. Did you have a moment where you went from "recovering" to "recovered"? or was it fluid and went by without noticing?

I ask because I'm at a stage where it doesn't feel like i'm 'actively' recovering... it just feels like life.

and
2. what does your job involve?

Eating Alone said...

You say your "recovered", how do you know? And how long did it take?

Thanks

Alice said...

Hey Arielle,

How did you get to the point where you were wiling and able to move away from your eating disorder, and not see 'going back if everything falls apart' as an option? Because that's what I'm struggling with. I can tell myself that it's time to give it all up, but in the back of my mind I can't help but feel that if recovery 'isn't for me' then I can always go back to it. It's like a security blanket.

Alice

Anonymous said...

OK, I have a question for you.
How you can find positivity and strenght to fight against anorexia, when all around - and, moreover inside - you spreads negativity?

J.

Kia said...

I have got this problem with my anorexia: whenever I'm underweight I like my body and I feel well with myself, but I know it's not healthy for my body, so (with the help of my nutritionist) I gain weight and I get to my set-point weight. But when I get to my set-point weight, I don't like my body, I'm sad and nervous, so I start rescrticting again, and I go underweight. Whenever I'm underweight... go back to the beginning and read all this several times, as it's all my life in the last 6 years.
How can I like my body when I have my set-point weight?
How can I break this vicious cycle?

P.S.= Sorry for my mistakes in what I've written, but I'm Italian... I hope you can understard what I mean...

licketysplit said...

~What role did 1:1 therapy play (if any) when you were in active recovery, after you had the tools you needed and were utilizing them and rarely using behaviors but still not yet 'recovered'?
~Is there anything you can remember helping you specifically with being able to accept your body? Although I'm in a much better place than I have been in past years, it seems like every time I get momentum to finally kick this thing to the curb, my body image gets in the way and takes me back to ED.
~Has your family always been supportive and understanding in regards to your eating disorder and recovery?
~When you were dating at what point did you feel it was appropriate to bring up your ED? I don't want a guy to think I'm being deceptive or closed off (because realistically my ED is a pretty big part of my past and NOT talking about it at all can get difficult) But I don't really want to scare him off before he even gets to know me.
That's all for now. Thanks!

when LESS is MORE said...

This is similar to other questions, but also a little different. I know you are now in recovery, but do you ever have days or even moments when you want to slip back into the behavior? It is hard for me to imagine not having the thoughts, even if I'm not acting out them.

Stella said...

Hi, I'm new here and I have two question for you. Hope I'm not too late to ask.
1 - How do you react when you feel hate for yourself and your body? What do you do when you feel overwehilmed, instead of hurting yourself or restricting?
2 - How can you fill the void you feel when you stop restricting so you can't count on anorexia "support"?

Arielle Bair (Becker) said...

Stella, you're certainly not too late to ask some questions. :) I have one more in the works to answer before moving on to your two. Yours will be #s 12 & 13. Thanks for coming by. I hope you'll stick around for the responses. :)

Anonymous said...

How can I stay with people when I've eaten? I feel so... dirty! It makes me anxious. it makes me cry...

Kia said...

Arielle, I'm sorry, I know I'm tedoius, but I have another question...
In these years of anorexia, I've stopped eating a lot of different foods (most of them, except fruits, vegetables, yogurt and meat), and some of the foods I've stopped eating, they have become some kind of "forbidden": I still can't eat come of them (such as pizza, ice-cream, hamburgers, wrustel, etc...), while I eat hardly some others... So, I wanted to ask you: have you lived something similar? If yes, have you solved the problem, or are there "forbidden" food to you, right now? Moreover: how did you solve this problem? How can you resist to put out again some foods from your nutrition?

Veggie said...

Hi Arielle!
I've noticed only right now your posts abour Q&A and I've got a question for you too...
What do you think about the role of the perfectionism in EDs? (Moreover, in anorexia?)
Have you got some tricks to be not overwhelmed from perfectionism?
I've asked this because I'm a "perfectionist" and I've got some problems to split the "healthy perfectionism" - which is part of my character - from the "anorexia perfectionism" - which plays a great part in the maintenance of my anorexia...

Lisa said...

I'm new to your site, and I might be late asking a question but I'll throw it out there anyway. I'm fighting really hard to get to a solid state of recovery after many years of anorexia & bulimia. I have a friend who I know is terribly entrenched in eating disorders (she told me). I want to help her, but doing so really puts my mental state on the line. But we've been friends for the past 18 years. I don't want to walk away from the friendship, but don't know how to stay in it. How did you get to the point where you could help others?

Arielle Bair (Becker) said...

Hey Lisa, you're not too late to ask a question. I will get to it ASAP - so stay tuned! And thanks for visiting. :)