Arielle's 2013 Thanksgiving Message

My annual Thanksgiving Day video for you:

Thanksgiving Message from Arielle

If today is hard for you, the message below is for you. It's my annual Thanksgiving message, and regardless of whether you're an American who celebrates this holiday or are living elsewhere, the message is still relevant. Take care of yourself, be kind to yourself, and celebrate how far you have come today. It's all about gratitude.

Happy Thanksgiving.

Happy Thanksgiving: Motivational Mash-Up #7

Fellow Americans, enjoy the day. Encouraging words for this holiday can be found on my blog from earlier years here Thanksgiving Message from Arielle, here Happy Thanksgiving...Don't Stress, and here Happy Thanksgiving 2007.

Hopefully this new Motivational Mash-Up will help give you a boost.

Thanksgiving Message from Arielle

For all the Americans out there, it's Thanksgiving Day today. Here's a message. :)

"Arielle's Mantra"

My fabulous fellow blogger, Medusa, posted something on her blog you should check out: Arielle's Mantra. Keep strong. Keep fighting.

Happy Thanksgiving!...Don't Stress!

For me and all of my American readers, tomorrow is Thanksgiving. As I said in a post from two years ago, it's a holiday that strikes fear in the hearts of many eating disordered individuals. Still, I wanted to take a moment to wish you all a happy Thanksgiving. I know it's a holiday that revolves around food and family, and for some, that can mean some serious triggering/anxiety/sadness, but maybe this post from 2007 can be helpful.

Along those lines, here is my Wednesday video for the week...two videos actually. Part 1 and Part 2. The topic was: Pressures & Triggers

As usual, just "click to view on YouTube."

PART ONE


PART TWO

A Common Bond

A friend recently informed me she had been reading this blog and that it really struck a chord with her. She hadn’t known about it and stumbled upon it randomly. She told me she read it avidly, every single post. She worried it was a violation of privacy, but I assured her it was a public site for a reason and I had no intention of hiding my battle with anorexia or my recovery from it.

I was extremely touched by her letter to me and very glad my blog had meant something to her, though she did not suffer from an eating disorder herself. She told me she had had some issues with food and body as well, and mentioned that she’d like to share her experiences with me. I can’t wait to have lunch with her and really talk.

It’s not that this friend didn’t know I had an eating disorder. She most certainly did. She just didn’t know I was writing about it, and then was unsure if I wanted her to find out that I was. Truth is, I want it out there. I feel it’s important. And a lot of people read it. And that’s okay with me. I have no problem talking to people about my past because it is a part of me and I have come a long way.

The topic of my eating disorder does not upset me. I examine my place in recovery every day in some form or another and I’m not afraid to talk about it, especially with people who want to understand. Really, a woman’s relationship with food is a more common thread between us all than we might realize. There are lots of different ways people use food, lots of different ways they cope, and lots of different ways they get healthy. I think it’s important to notice this.

My friend told me that she had her own journey to discover who she is and who she is with food. I like that she told me that. I feel closer to her just knowing she can relate to this blog. My friend also mentioned that she was worried about eating in front of me or about openly displaying her own habits she uses to keep herself healthy. As I told her, people don’t have to worry about eating in front of me or about the habits they use to keep themselves healthy. I have learned to not be triggered by these things. I will always be aware of eating disordered issues, but I can truthfully say that I consider myself recovered and I’m okay now. I would not have started this blog in the first place if I didn’t think I was strong enough to be someone who could help others. I’m great now! Happy, healthy, and very recovery-oriented. It doesn’t rule my life in the least, so to anyone who ever worried—I would say please don’t feel self-conscious about eating with me.

There was a time when I would have been uncomfortable to even go out to eat with any of my friends. That was a couple years ago now. For the last almost two years I’ve been actively recovering, gaining weight, staying healthy and fit at the same time, and working on learning about myself and my eating disorder. I’ve helped myself mentally. I’ve learned to live in the world at last.

In the letter my friend wrote me, she asked about my experience being mistreated by girls in middle school. And she had questions about the impact of my eating disorder on our own friendship. I tried to answer her as best I could. It’s often hard to come up with definitive answers in respect to eating disorders. At least that’s been my experience.

She was familiar with my middle school "mean girls" scenario. It messed me up for years even though I didn’t outwardly dwell on it much. I know she remembers. I didn’t realize how eating disordered this incident made me until later. It was definitely a weird kind of coping mechanism. The friend I’m speaking of was a great friend to me during that time and thankfully helped me cope in healthy ways along with my unhealthy ones.

I tried to get across to my friend that in the future, I’d be honored to be the listener if she wants to talk to me about her relationship with food. I think we can both understand each other well.

“I want to learn more than I already thought I knew,” she wrote to me. “ It's important as a woman and a future teacher, and as your friend.”

As I said to her, I think that’s wonderful. I feel that way too. It’s definitely a continuing goal of mine. And I so appreciate her saying it to me. It means so much and I’ve thought about that statement a lot since she wrote it to me a few weeks ago.

So, in closing, to my friend, I’d like to say: Thank you.

Here’s to honesty and sisterhood.

Happy Thanksgiving

Well, it's that time of year again that just may strike fear or panic into your heart: Thanksgiving.

It's a day where the focus is typically on food and family. Enough said.

But try to see today as positive, not negative. Remember that Thanksgiving can be a day to reflect on what you are thankful for, and it can be a day to nourish yourself.

Whether you're afraid of eating too little or too much, of being noticed or monitored, or of being just plain uncomfortable in such a setting...remember to breathe.

Take a moment today before you sit down to the meal or before you head off to spend time with family or friends...and just breathe. Tell yourself you are strong and today is just another day. Then eat to nourish yourself. Not to be gluttonous or disordered, but simply to nourish. Don't restrict yourself. If you're afraid of getting out of control in the other sense, don't gorge. Just eat. And try to relax. And remember this: you are not alone.

There are many people out there today feeling what you are feeling. Many people panicking or afraid. Think of everyone who is struggling as you are and dig right in.

Today is what you make it.

I know Thanksgiving can be scary. But if you start with a positive outlook, you can make it through and try to enjoy yourself this year. I know it's easier said than done. Encourage yourself to take care of yourself. Just set a goal for yourself that is reasonable and not over-the-top for where you are at in your life. Simply say: I will make the best of this day.

Perhaps you can keep something positive in your pocket (like a quote, saying, or some good reinforcement from wherever you choose) and look at it when you're feeling the urge to restrict, binge, purge, or just get upset. Eat what you want because it's Thanksgiving and it's about feeling good--not bad. When you feel yourself faltering, look at your positive item, whatever it may be. Don't forget you want to be kind to yourself and allow yourself to enjoy what is before you.

I will think of all of you, send you some good vibes, and love myself and my Thanksgiving day.
Here's to a Happy Thanksgiving!

Arielle