A Brand New Motivational Mash-Up for EDAW

EDAW continues... and here is a brand new Motivational Mash-Up, much like the 11 before it, in case you need a boost. :-)

New Eating Disorder Topics?!

Watch this super short, fun video and hit me with them.

 

How to Say NO and Not Feel Guilty

VERY important topic this week. HIGHLY important. VITAL.

How to Compliment Yourself!

This week's Wednesday video: How to Compliment Yourself! And it's only 1 minute. ONE minute. :-)

You're Invited to a Celebration!

Need a pick-me-up? This quick, bonus video might be just the thing for today:

RELAPSES versus Setbacks

This week's video details the difference between setbacks/slip-ups and relapses, but I also provide encouragement, prevention measures, and how to improve your awareness.

EDAW13: Motivational Mash-Up!

Here it is - a BRAND NEW Motivational Mash-up for Eating Disorder Awareness Week. If you're in need of some kindhearted encouragement, this is for you.

Questions for the Self

This week, I encourage you to ask yourself these questions:

• What do you most want to change? 

• What do you think you could easily do differently...and what's stopping you? 

• What does freedom mean to you? 

• And what do you need to put into place to achieve it? 

• Who are your supports? 

• How can you utilize them more than you are currently? 

 

• What are your most toxic elements in life? 

• How can you better distance yourself from them? 

I really invite you to have a conversation with yourself, even write down your responses to form new goals and plans, and to envision a better year. Later on in the week, I will delve into these questions in more detail, but before they can be discussed, pondered, and used for reflection and re-framing, you first need to ask them. So start... and I will follow up with some food for thought. 

These questions were meant to be the topic of this week's Wednesday Warrior video, but due to some overwhelming time constraints, I haven't been able to film a video in time to have it up for Wednesday. You'll either get a video a few days late (hate to do that - I'm always on time!) or a detailed blog post on this topic (these important questions) by the weekend. Either way, don't pass them off as too general, too basic, or too silly. Far too often, we forget to ask ourselves the really important things, the things that shape recovery and LIFE.

What IS Motivational Speaking?

Motivation is the desire to do things. What those "things" are is up to you. A definition for motivation is:

the act or an instance of motivating,  or providing with a reason to act in a certain way

I like to think that I do both of those things - that Actively Arielle: A Voice with a Commitment and everything this site, the videos, Twitter, and beyond stand for is pure and simple motivation.  In any case, that is my goal. Motivational speaking, broken down, is very basic, guileless, honest, and pure. It is not some grandiose thing that sets someone apart from the rest of the world. 

To me, motivational speaking is about you. For you. 

As for the speaking aspect of the term motivational speaking, there are many different ways to speak. Through spoken word, through video, through typed words on a screen, through images and declarations of encouragement...

Actions speak. And then they motivate.

Which means... (that's right!)... YOU can motivate too. 

Take a Break!

Be kind to yourself. Put yourself first. Take a break!

Arielle's Motivational Mash-Up #10

Brand new Motivational Mash-Up, much like the previous 9. This week, it's also serving as my Wednesday Warrior video. Enjoy! Stay well! Have a fabulous rest of the week!

Day #20: The Sound of Silence

Often people who battle eating disorders (and/or other mental health problems) generally
experience a kind of silence in terms of the restrictions that illness or other people place
upon their ability to share their struggles. What does silence mean to you? How
did you change it? How can you break the silence?

Perfect! I did a video this February that was actually CALLED "Break the Silence."

This one too: it's my most recent Motivational Mash-Up (like the previous 8), but much of the theme is Breaking the Silence. Check it out!

Day #3: Create a Mascot...

Oh my, it's just simply so serendipitous that this prompt should pop up in the Blogger Challenge. I'm cackling to myself and beyond delighted to share with you something that came about randomly just a few days ago: Arielle's Recovery Cats.

Many of you follow me on Twitter @arielleleebair and while the account is primarily for eating disorder recovery oriented tweets, I do often tweet about my life. And when I say "life," I sometimes mean "cats."

So, I tweeted a few days back that the 2 things I tweet about the most are eating disorders and cats. I mused via Twitter how cool it would be if the two could be combined somehow. And just like that, Arielle's Recovery Cats was born.

I decided on a whim that I would post a new "Recovery Cat" each day on Twitter. A Recovery Cat is a cat (created by me) accompanied by a positive saying that's related to e/d recovery. It's like positive affirmations + a cat. I like to keep things light-hearted, simple, and of course positive.

Here are the first few Recovery Cats. I'm in the process of creating a Print Shop (which will have its own separate tab on my site) so a variety of Recovery Cats can be purchased in print, magnet, and postcard form. And maybe a few other tidbits too. So stay tuned.

 

But regardless of whether or not a Print Shop exists, you can definitely say that Arielle's Recovery Cats are the new official mascot of Actively Arielle: A Voice with a Commitment. These cats want to push your eating disorder away so they can cuddle you. :-)

So watch out, people! Arielle's Recovery Cats are coming for you! And they take eating disorder recovery very seriously!

What do YOU think about Arielle's Recovery Cats?

Personal Responsibilty

Support & Healthy Role Models in Preparation for International Women's Day

Arielle's Letters to YOU

I'd like to direct your attention to the "Arielle's Letters to YOU" tab at the header of my site. It's a place where I compiled all my letters and main messages to you - the ones written directly to YOU.

You can click here to view Arielle's Letters to YOU. It seems appropriate to direct you there during Eating Disorder Awareness Week. I hope you'll give it a look. You don't have to read all the letters. You can read the ones that jump out at you, the ones you need.

On that page you will find the letters (from 2007 to 2012) entitled:

• You Are Invited to A Celebration (a post from last week in honor of EDAW and YOU)
• Dear Readers, You Are Not Alone
• You Are Beautiful
• What Gives You Hope?
• Appreciate Today
• An Important Message
• A Word to Worried Parents
• Letter to All
• The Rope
• You Are a Beautiful Flower
• I Invite You to Live

I hope you'll read them, take them to heart, and continue on this journey of life.

Pro-Recovery Project: Arielle's Words

Anyone who knows me, who has read my blog for the last 4+ years, and has watched my motivational speaking videos knows that I am PRO-RECOVERY. Being pro-recovery is part of my very essence. I'm happy and excited to be part of Anne-Sophie's Pro-Recovery Project, which is showcasing one recovery blogger for each day in the month of February.

Well, readers, today is my day. And it's your day too. The day is waiting for you. Don't make it wait too long.

Anyone can tell you to recover. You have to choose recovery for yourself. But what's more - you GET to chose it for yourself. It's YOUR gift. It's YOUR reward. I always like to share a little something I call Arielle's Mantra:

Recovery is possible.

It's not a guarantee. It's a possibility.

It's not simple. It is difficult and sometimes seems impossible.

It's not a one-step process. It's a multi-step process complete with twists and turns and bending roads...and roads you didn't even know were there.

It's not the same for everyone.

It's not always a happy process. It's not always a sad process.

It IS empowering.

It's not about pleasing other people. It is not about them.

It's about YOU.

It's not about perfection. It IS about emotion. It IS about honesty. It IS about self-discovery and self-affirmation.

It's not about what you don't have. It's about using what you've got.

It's not about hiding. It's about finding and displaying.

It's not a quick-fix. It's a lifelong plan set into motion by truth and nurturing and self-love.

It's not about external factors or environment. It IS about what's within.

It is not crazy. It IS real.

Recovery is possible.

This mantra has its own tab on the top of my site. It deserves its own tab, because this right here is a mantra to repeat - over and over again. It's not only my mantra for you, it's my message to you.

When it comes to eating disorder recovery, there are many different kinds of people. There are those who believe in full recovery, those who believe in full recovery – but not for themselves, and those who do not believe in it at all. I think full recovery is possible for everyone. Will it happen for everyone? No. But is it possible? Yes. You get to choose to take the steps to do it. To put your plans and goals and hopes and dreams into action. The dream of New Life FREE of an eating disorder is an excellent, worthy dream that can become a reality.

There are a lot of factors that influence a person’s ability to recover, but real recovery from an eating disorder happens, and it happens every day. It’s not a matter of beating the odds, but of beating the eating disorder.

When influential folks say that full recovery from an eating disorder is unlikely, I get angry. When they imply that full recovery will happen to one in a million (or some equally incomprehensible number), I get upset. When they focus on all the people who have NOT recovered instead of those who have, I get emotional.

It’s difficult to promote recovery to those struggling with eating disorders when they are constantly being told that the odds are against them. Why bother trying at all? If you are already deemed to be (and doomed to be) a statistic from the start, what’s the point in paying money for treatment/care/counseling or getting support from friends/family/services? Isn’t it all a waste?

The short answer is: NO. Not only is recovery completely possible, it’s also worth every effort. Whether you’re involved with a whole treatment team, simply seeing one therapist, using an alternative support system, or going it alone – recovery is possible, real, and wonderful.

I know this, because I’m a recovered individual myself. It wasn’t always an easy path. I worked hard, used support, created support I didn’t already have, and kept climbing.

Today, I’m happy and healthy in body and mind. I've been fully recovered for some years now. I live my every day, a woman who is transformed from the girl she used to be. I think things start to disappear one by one as we recover. I think the more obvious pieces go first. We get to a healthy weight (whatever that is for us and our respective disorders). We let go of behaviors. We stop berating ourselves. We stop looking for perfection. We stop seeing perfection where it doesn't exist. We let go of pain. We let go of the past. We slowly let go of the thoughts, a day at a time, until we realize one day (like I did) that they're not there. They don't accompany me. They don't hide out in my mind waiting to come out if the opportunity presents itself. Call me “fat,” call me “ugly,” call me “stupid,” tell me I "shouldn't be eating all the food" that's on my plate... and I'll still be serene and confident in myself, in my recovery, in my body and my way of life. The change has taken place. I'm okay now. It's a beautiful reality.

I can't promise you that during some terrible, sad, or scary time in my life I won’t for a split second remember how I used to cope. But I can promise you this: I'm done with my eating disorder and I'm done with the thoughts, and if one ever does re-appear in my head, it'll be gone and I'll be on my feet no matter what life throws at me, because I've found the secret. I've learned to stand.

There have been a few times I've been asked, what are your top reasons in favor of recovery? Or is it worth it? Or more often, how do you know you're recovered? 

And this is the answer I always give:

- Because my life doesn't revolve around food, exercise, feelings of hunger, my own image in the mirror, the way my clothes fit, what people say to me regarding appearance or success/failure.

-Because I actually have a life.

-Because when I wake up in the morning I am content, not filled with despair.

-Because I don't have to work at it. It is now natural.

-Because I can help others without being triggered by them.

-Because I live by what I’m writing here.

-Because I like my body.

-Because I even, most of the time, LOVE my body.

-Because I am at peace with issues of my adolescence.

-Because I can eat without over-thinking.

-Because I don't binge or purge or starve myself.

-Because I don't even WANT to binge, purge, or starve myself.

-Because I don't care what the number on a scale says and it used to incredibly define me.

-Because I am a healthy weight.

-Because I appreciate myself instead of hate myself.

-Because I feel free.

I am here in the moment and not afraid to eat, look, live, love. And you can do it too.

The length of time isn't what's important. It can take 3 years or 30 years. The goal is to get to the point where you can say, “I'm free” and mean it. Don't give yourself a deadline. Don't beat yourself up for slip-ups. Just. keep. trying.

Understand my main point: being "recovered" isn't about always being happy 100% of the time—it's about knowing what to do when you're not.

No matter how many cons there are to your dilemma, one big pro outweighs them all: you getting better, you feeling better, you learning to live life again.

Put more faith in yourself than in your eating disorder. Don’t underestimate your power to move forward and stay there. It all starts with you.

(For more inspiring words and encouragement in the recovery department, visit Fighting Anorexia - and remember, once February comes to a close, Fighting Anorexia will be publishing links to every blogger who participated in the Pro-Recovery Project!)

Oh, and one more thing - just a friendly reminder:

Voices of Recovery

I'm excited to share with you some special voices. I am privileged  to know a few fantastic fellow bloggers who are recovered. I don't like to imply that there is some hierarchy of recovery in which those who consider themselves fully recovered are better than those who are not. I just like to show people out there who are struggling or who are still fighting their way through recovery that full recovery is completely possible and real.

Therefore, I'd like to do a series of "interviews" with a variety of fellow bloggers. Some are dear friends of mine, others are new friends, and others are what I'd call colleague friends. My goal is to showcase people who are writing about recovery and are healthy and well themselves. You know me - I want to spread positivity and GOOD messages. Some of the questions I ask each recovery blogger will be different from those I ask the other bloggers, and some will be the same. You may find that you know some of the bloggers. Perhaps you already read their blogs or are familiar with their stories. Others may be new to you.

In a nutshell, I like to show people that I'm not the only recovered lady out there using my voice. Sometimes I think people think I'm like 1 in a million or something. So please stay tuned. 2 interviews are fully finished and 2 more are in the works. I hope to share the first blogger with you next week.

Arielle's Motivational Mash-Up # 8!

A brand new Motivational Mash-Up like the previous 7! Hope you enjoy. Have a wonderful rest of the week.

Warnings About "Quick Fixes"

This week's Wednesday Warrior video is up and it's all about warnings, as you will see. I end with snippets of my newest Motivational Mash-Up, which is up on my YouTube channel. I will link to it in a new post later this week.