Eating Disorders by the Numbers

On this last day of EDAW, I let the numbers speak for me.

Eating disorders by the numbers | Create Infographics

EDNOS: It's Serious!

Day 6 of EDAW and I'm still highlighting populations that are often overlooked.

EDNOS: Its Serious | Create Infographics

My EDAW 2014 Message to You

Every week is Eating Disorder Awareness Week for me.

A Brand New Motivational Mash-Up for EDAW

EDAW continues... and here is a brand new Motivational Mash-Up, much like the 11 before it, in case you need a boost. :-)

And the Winners Are...

Joy C!
Thaleia K!
Christina Z!
Chloe F!

I chose the winners of my giveaway at random, as all the awareness stories I received were fabulous. I am so proud of all your efforts.

When Joy hears negative body talk she stops it and takes her nieces on Operation Beautiful note drops! Go, Joy!
  
Middle Eastern Dance (belly dance) helped with Thaleia's recovery, so she is excited to use that as a medium to raise awareness. She is planning a dance showcase that will raise money for one of my favorite ED associations. As part of the program, she will provide information and resources. Yay, Thaleia!

Christina got a tattoo of the National Eating Disorder Recovery symbol. Friends are often intrigued by what it means and she shares her story of success. She says she makes sure that she is never ashamed by what she has been though and makes sure people know they are not alone. She shares this blog with friends that are struggling and has made her voice heard in smaller venues such as with co-workers, in school assignments, and classroom chat. Thank you, Christina!

Chloe says in Northern Ireland there is little to no awareness of eating disorders, so she has arranged to meet with Fixers.org.uk to start her own campaign called 'Can you stomach it?' The campaign is all about eating disorders and the issues that surround them in her own country as well as other countries. She has written articles for her University magazine, started a blog, and has begun talking more openly about her eating disorder on Facebook and with people. Great work, Chloe!

Joy, Thaleia, Christina, and Chloe - Please send me a FB message, Twitter direct message, or email with your contact info so I can mail you your e/d awareness bracelet. If I do not hear from you by the end of the week, I will attempt to contact you directly, but I do not have an email address for all of you. Thank you and I hope you enjoy the jewelry!

For those of you who would like to purchase an eating disorder awareness bracelet, you can do so here at my friend Mellissa's Etsy shop: Noor's Handmade Products

Each of the winners of my giveaway will receive one of these 4 unique bracelets:

And remember - awareness can continue all year long!

EDAW13: Arielle Gives Voice to EDNOS

Technically from last year's EDAW, but still remains super important:

EDAW13: Go! Live! Choose Recovery!

Just a quick 45 second message:

EDAW13: Wednesday Warrior

This week's usual Wednesday video is up. The topic this week is "How You Can Use Your Voice." It's meant to be directly associated with Eating Disorder Awareness Week...but you know what? The best way you can REALLY use your voice is below... and it's important during EDAW and beyond.

EDAW13: Don't Wait, Accept the Invitation

It's brief. If you have 2 minutes, watch. And remember.

And don't forget to participate in Arielle's EDAW Giveaway if you want to win 1 of 4 eating disorder awareness bracelets. Details (and photos) here: http://tearstowords.blogspot.com/2013/02/arielles-eating-disorder-awareness.html

EDAW13: Sisterhood United

Those of you who have watched my Wednesday videos for years are probably aware that I am part of a collaboration on YouTube with other fantastic women who are working to help those with eating disorders. This weekend, I had the honor and privilege of being with Jenn (who makes videos on Saturday) and Rachel (who makes videos on Thursdays), as well as Caroline (who used to make videos for the channel years ago). I was also in the presence of another great activist, Kendra from Voice in Recovery.

For Eating Disorder Awareness Week, I plan to post a video every day. Day 1 of EDAW, you get this:

a beautiful video of 3 sisters from various locations coming together to laugh and smile and be silly. The friendship I have with Jenn is unparalleled and is only blossoming more and more. The friendship I have with Rachel has been 6 years running...and I only just met her on Saturday...because she lives in the UK. It's amazing that it finally happened.

While this video is extremely informal and has nothing to do with eating disorder advice, it's motivational in a simple way: it's 3 recovered women enjoying each other's presence, celebrating not only Eating Disorder Awareness Week, but friendship, sisterhood, and a life of FREEDOM!

You can have this.

Arielle's Eating Disorder Awareness Giveaway

I'm having a giveaway. Get ready!

Watch the brief video for instructions and get to it! :-)
Items provided by Noor's Handmade Products

I'm having a giveaway - to participate, send me a YT message, email, FB message, tweet, blog comment, or video with your brief awareness story!

Move Along, but Not Alone...

So, EDAW has come to a close. I hope you've enjoyed the more frequent posting in honor of the TWO weeks I chose to represent EDAW (UK & US).

But remember, Every Week is Eating Disorder Awareness Week to Arielle.

To close, I'll leave you with this - A Lesson in Facts. It's an old video and it's short - but it's some good reinforcement to head into a new week.

Arielle's Letters to YOU

I'd like to direct your attention to the "Arielle's Letters to YOU" tab at the header of my site. It's a place where I compiled all my letters and main messages to you - the ones written directly to YOU.

You can click here to view Arielle's Letters to YOU. It seems appropriate to direct you there during Eating Disorder Awareness Week. I hope you'll give it a look. You don't have to read all the letters. You can read the ones that jump out at you, the ones you need.

On that page you will find the letters (from 2007 to 2012) entitled:

• You Are Invited to A Celebration (a post from last week in honor of EDAW and YOU)
• Dear Readers, You Are Not Alone
• You Are Beautiful
• What Gives You Hope?
• Appreciate Today
• An Important Message
• A Word to Worried Parents
• Letter to All
• The Rope
• You Are a Beautiful Flower
• I Invite You to Live

I hope you'll read them, take them to heart, and continue on this journey of life.

Arielle's Timeline to Freedom

Check it out. My Wednesday Warrior video this week is a little something different, to keep highlighting Eating Disorder Awareness Week.

Outcomes of an Eating Disorder, A Simple Chart

This is just something I wanted to share. Project "STOP Eating Disorders" put this up and I immediately liked it. It's on my Facebook Wall currently, for those of you who follow me there. It's SO, SO, SO simple, but it lays it all out clearly. You DO have options. But one is a lot better than the others. Take it to heart, today and every day. Let it sit in the back of your mind, the front of your mind, wherever you can keep it for right now.

Video: Arielle Talks About Shame

Sonnet for the Self

Inside the mind, there is a little room.

It has a tiny lock and just one key.

Around it, doubt and shadows tend to loom,

But when the door is opened, truth goes free.

This little room—it houses all self-love.

Tear down the curtains; let the sunlight in.

No need to worry what you’re worthy of—

To love yourself can never be a sin.

Just bask beneath the rays of love and pride,

And never keep this bright room locked away.

Do not be meek or feel you have to hide—

Without self-love, true joy will never stay.

So give this room all that you have to give,

And you will always have a place to live.

(c) Arielle Lee Bair 2006

Every Week is EDAW to Arielle

If you live in the UK, my Eating Disorder Awareness Week posts (a post a day this past week) probably seemed normal. If you live in the United States, you may have been confused. EDAW in the UK began February 20^th, 2012. EDAW in the USA begins February 26^th, 2012. If you live in Canada, I missed the boat. Apparently Canada’s EDAW is always the first week in February, though I know some of the time Canada adjusts for certain US events. If you live somewhere else besides the US or UK, you’re in luck – pick a week. :) My site is dedicated to eating disorder recovery/awareness for everyone.

At first I was puzzled by the fact that this year for some reason EDAW is different weeks depending on location, when usually it is one uniform week for all. But then I decided, this is actually a GOOD thing. Considering that I live in the US, I’m fairly well-integrated into several groups/orgs that originate in the UK. I am also a member of EDAN (Eating Disorder Activist Network), which is international. And I have several good friends in the UK. Furthermore, many of my readers/viewers are not US-based. So, as an American, I hopped on UK’s Eating Disorder Awareness Week.

Now that America’s EDAW is about to kick off, I’m just continuing my post-a-day theme and you’ll get 2 full weeks of concentrated eating disorder recovery/awareness posts.

In short, 2 weeks of EDAW is better than one!

But in discussing EDAW as a theme, I’d like to talk about something important: EDAW to me, is no different than any other week. Sure, I always jump on the bandwagon of extra recovery/awareness collaborations and sharing of special events in honor of the week. But if you visit my site, you know (and have probably known for a long, long time) that eating disorder recovery and awareness is what I talk about EVERY DAY. I don’t devote a week to it. Even while trying to be international, I don’t devote just 2 weeks to it. I devote my year to it... my LIFE to it.

In my world, EDAW goes on all year long. I do the same things during EDAW that I do every week – I speak about eating disorders, I write about them, I give advice, I lead groups, I answer emails and phone calls, I make self-help videos, I try to give hope.

I said in a video from earlier this week that EDAW is your time to shout out eating disorder awareness stuff from the rooftops. Well, that’s what I do each day. It’s my essence. I can’t take time off from something so incredibly important to me, because it’s not only important to me, it’s important for the WORLD.

This isn’t a post to show you how dedicated I am – this is me pledging to you that I will never stop speaking out about issues that are vital. I’m in this for the long haul and I want you to know that if you need to take a day, a week, a month, a year off from the cause, it’s okay – because I will always be here fighting for you and using my voice.

...Because one day I want EDAW to stand for Eating Disorder Awareness WORLD, not Week.

With love and (com)passion,

Arielle

Invest in You

7 years ago, in 2005, at age 20, I wrote a letter to myself as a child.

Arielle,

Don't be afraid. I'll carry you quietly, because you need complete and unconditional love--and my arms will be full of enough understanding that I won't have to use words.

I'll show you what it is to live for you and not for others and what they say and do. I'll let you cry when you need to without feeling ashamed and I'll comfort you like a blanket that soothes all your troubles, worries, and aching limbs. I'll let you stretch into a woman and prove to you how great it can be when you accept yourself and all the changes that go along with being you.

I'll travel great distances to listen to what you have to say. I'll never make you feel alone, unwanted, slighted, or misunderstood. I'll let you be mature when you want to be and I'll let you be a child when it helps you to heal. I'll make promises and I won't break them.

I'll brush your hair. I'll rub your back. I'll sing you songs. I'll nourish you. I won't suppress you--or second-guess you--or leave you. I am invested in you.

You are important to me...because you are me.

Love, Arielle 

I share this so that you can see how genuine and real and comforting it can be. I share this so that when I invite you to write a similar letter to yourself as a child, you'll know I walk the talk. Will writing a letter to yourself as a child heal all your pain? No. Will it be that magic recipe that sends that eating disorder packing for good? Probably not. But will it help? I hope so. It certainly can't hurt.

So, your mission - if you choose to accept it - is to find a photo of yourself as a child. Happy, sad, lonely, sweet, funny, silly, whatever it is! And look into that little face. And with it next to you, grab a piece of paper and write to YOU. Or prop it in front of your computer and start typing... and write to YOU. The little you.

Why? Because it can be hard to write loving things to the adult you, the current you. (It shouldn't be! But it often is!) But it's very VERY hard to write mean, self-hating, disappointed things to a child - even when that child is you.

Give that child what it needs. Say what you need to say. Say what you need to hear. Be real. Be genuine. Be loving.

Preparing for a Rocky Road & Facing Fear of Failure

Question: 

What's the mentality of a person who wants recovery?

Answer: 

 The mentality (of a person who wants recovery) is one that will do whatever it takes to be rid of the eating disorder. The mentality is one of determination, desire, and hope.

We may not all be pillars of strength—especially in our own minds—but that doesn't mean we don't have the drive and determination to get better. If you have the real desire to truly recover, it's within your reach. And if you have the hope that it can and will happen, it's waiting for you. Understand that first and foremost, and you have taken the first step. It's a mental step, sure, but it's a significant step.

If you try to walk up the steps and the first step at the bottom is missing, you're going to trip…or worse—you're going to slip right on through and fall harder.

Mold your mentality first. Understand that you can do it. Don't try, yet still in your heart of hearts think it's impossible. You won't get anywhere that way. You'll keep hitting road blocks.

That's not to say that a path of recovery is without obstacles just because you have the right mentality. The path of recovery is going to be a difficult one no matter what, but that doesn't mean you can't travel it—it just means you have to be prepared.

And you know what happens when you manage to get to the end of a long and rocky road: the reward is that much sweeter.

For those IN recovery, I think it's only natural to be afraid your eating disorder will come back...but the important thing is that if it ever DOES come back, you have the tools to fight it

Fear is only going to bring you down. It can take quite a while to be rid of an eating disorder, especially if it has been with you for a while, and no amount of relapses makes your recovery any less valid. It is a difficult fight, but you can do it. You’ll have good days and bad days. Just remember what you truly want. If recovery is your goal, you are already far along on your journey to a better life.

Bad days are inevitable, but you can pull through. Being afraid to slip back into your eating disorder can make you run closer to recovery, but if the fear becomes so great that one setback makes you doubt yourself, you need to recognize it and fight it.

Fear like this means you’re just waiting for your eating disorder to take hold of you again. It means you don’t think you can really get away from it. And in that case, you won’t.

We are all human and one setback does not negate all the hard work you put in up until that point. You aren't starting again at square one just because you had a setback. You are working towards something that is hard to achieve and it's only natural you will have slip-ups. If you recognize that you did something you didn't like, and feel bad over it, just get back on the road to recovery. That road is always waiting. That's all there is to it: putting a slip-up behind you. Many people with eating disorders have relapses (sometimes multiple relapses) before they feel they are recovered. Just keep hopping back on the track to your goal.

Think of it this way: If you want to get from California to New York and you drive 1,000 miles, then stop your car and therefore stop making progress, you don't have to start back at California to get on your way to New York again! You are still 1,000 miles of the way there. You may have stopped and therefore your trip will take more time, but you don't have to start over. Just get back in the car and keep going. You'll get there eventually. And you can stop as many times as you want.

Put more faith in yourself than in your eating disorder. Drive that car!

 

 I believe in you!